Going back to college was okay, but it stung like a tiny lesson in itself. After dropping out of college in my second year, I found myself enrolling again three years later. I was committing to studying something I never planned on studying.
I thought studying Arts would be nice. I have time, so why not do something that is important for the kind of life I want to live?
Why did it feel like a lesson?
For one thing, I am already 25 and I have no degree to show as proof of my education. Had other things to show, but a 3 year college degree was a must. A degree is a big thing. The 18-year-old version of me didn’t know that a degree was this important. However, the 25-year-old me knows exactly why it matters. I always asked myself, how I will possibly do my PG in my favourite field if I won’t take this step.
I have knowledge of other things, but a college degree is the one thing I need to feel more validated. My head spun around this thought for a while. I thought about it a lot because academic pressure is actually a serious part of my life. I give myself that pressure more than anyone.
It might feel hard when I have to manage it alongside other parts of my life, specially work. Personally, it feels kind of scary to enter a phase by choice that you know you might not like that much, but it’s okay. I accepted the punishment, and I promised myself that I will try my best.
While choosing a place to study, I came to the conclusion that doing it through distance learning would be perfect for me. Thanks to Amity Online. I only have to be disciplined, and I think I can trust myself with that.
Was it necessary?
Personally, I would disagree. But there is a system, and who am I not to follow it? Even data says that a Bachelor’s degree is worth around $2.8 million on average over a human lifetime. And there is a reality where if you don’t have a degree, then you are not qualified to work at good places. I had to make a choice, and I chose to see myself living with more confidence, financial stability, and authenticity.
Dear self: To have that, you need to be self-assured about some things and nothing can beat the peace you will have in your mind.
After a long discussion with myself, I concluded that it’s important and we are doing it. It was more important than anything else. I really can’t imagine myself not working, ever.
How do I feel about it?
Neutral, I guess. I can hate it from the place where I don’t like the obligation, but then I get to learn some good things and I feel better about the decision I took. I also read about how the time we spend during our college years helps us with critical thinking. So, no matter how stressful or overwhelming it gets, I am going to enjoy the process. It is a win-win situation.
I hope I graduate soon. I really need a break.
The Pros and Cons of Committing
On the good side:
- I get to learn so much more than what I already know.
- I can make more money after I graduate.
- I learn to think differently.
- I get to admire the world and how it helps me grow.
On the bad side:
- Academic pressure is real.
- People might make fun of my decision to go back late.
- I will find some parts of it boring.
- Time and work management will be a struggle.
Conclusion
So far, after going back and forth for days in my mind, I finally decided that it’s worth it. There are some disadvantages to this decision, and I am scared of leaving it halfway once again, but I’ll try my best.
I think taking it as a phase of growth, rather than a burden, can make it feel like a good experience.